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Methods of Helping your Child Cope with the Change of Moving Home

28/6/2022

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I’m going to cut to the chase in this post!
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There are three key ways you can support your child when moving home.

Reassure

Place attachment is connected to object attachment for children, and for adults. Have you ever moved home as an adult with dreams of creating an entirely new home but then have recreated, often subconsciously, exactly the same set up in your new place as your old place? That’s place and object attachment. And it is bringing your ‘home’ to your new space. Reassuring children that they will still have the furniture, objects and possessions that are important to them is helpful. If they will not be having any/many of these things in their new home (because of your moving circumstances), you can reassure them by talking about the things that will be staying the same – like the people they are moving with, or particular toys. 

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How to Move Home With Kids: Place Attachment and Loss from a Child’s Perspective

27/5/2022

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Recently I moved home with my kids, so I wanted to share my thoughts and experience with you. The keyword of my blog post title is ‘home’. I didn’t write house, or flat, because ‘home’ is not material, it is a psychological conception of belonging. 

The idea of ‘home’ is important to all of us but for children home is rooted to their literal and psychological sense of safety. Home is (hopefully) the place where they can be who they are, it is their space of love, support, and self-discovery. 

‘Home’ is bound intrinsically to a child’s sense of identity.

​Home is the place in which children develop their environmental attachments. A parent or caregiver has only to think of the time they did a big clean of their living space, decluttered, reorganised objects and perhaps furniture, and then excitedly brought their children home from nursery or school only to be met with a child’s distress as things were not in the right place, or a child’s outrage and incredulity that it looked completely different and was no longer ‘home’.

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Living the Dream

7/5/2022

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What if we’re not living the dream? What to do when moving doesn’t feel like it was the right thing to do

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Have you ever tried the cornflour and water experiment with your kids?
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It’s really weird! If you put the cornflour and water mixture in your hand, it runs through your fingers but if you poke it, it goes hard. Then it goes runny again (it’s called a non-Newtonian fluid, just in case you’re interested).
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I was playing this with my kids the other day and it struck me – this is what it can feel like after we have moved home. We poke the mixture – we make the change, we move home. And we might think that everything will feel more solid afterwards. We’ll have everything we dreamt of. We feel like everything is more ‘together’. We’ll feel happier. Our kids will feel happier. Life will be better. We’ll fulfil our dreams.
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Moving Home and Changing Schools: A step-by-step guide to navigating the school admissions process

3/7/2021

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Moving Home and changing schools step by step guide, Naomi Tyrrell PhD
Oh, my goodness this is such a hot topic in parenting groups, isn’t it?! I know parents (me included!) can feel really anxious about the idea of kids having to change school because of a home move. 

Different countries have different processes for applying for school places. I live in England and even within areas of England there are slight differences so there’s no way I can cover all school admission processes across the globe in one blog post! Sorry! 
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However, what I am going to do is give you some top tips for navigating the schools admissions process when moving home within England (and applying for state schools), and hopefully these steps are useful more widely too. 

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How Can I Get My Child to Sleep When We Move House?

9/2/2021

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Sleeping child after moving home

Moving house involves change. Change can disrupt sleep.

I think sleep is probably one of the most talked about topics in parenting circles in the Early Years, isn’t it?!  If you throw moving home into the mix of the not-enough-sleep phase of family life, you may wonder how you will ever survive!

​Fear not, I’ve teamed up with sleep expert Rhian from Rested Mama to give you some top tips to help your child settle to sleep in your new home. 


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5 Top Tips For A Successful Moving Day with Kids

31/1/2021

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Good news: having a strategy for moving day that is tailored to your circumstances helps your kids!

Bad news: there is no ‘right way’ to do moving day with kids.
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Sorry, I wish there was!

​The first time we moved house (and regions) with kids, I was 34 weeks pregnant and we had a toddler. Possibly not the best plan but hey, life happens! The second time we moved house (and regions – again!) we had two kids under 5. Both times, we planned a strategy that fitted with our children’s needs, as well as what was possible. Big thanks to my mum for her help!
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Moving day can be very busy and stressful. It can also last longer than a day!
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Here are my research-based ‘5 top tips’ for having a successful moving day(s) with kids.
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Moving House with Kids: Declutter Toys or Not?

15/12/2020

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Toys, stuff and preparing to move

​‘Mum, where’s my sheep?’
‘What sheep?’
‘The sheep with the green scarf, from Ireland.’
‘Umm…’
Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
That little sheep toy with the green scarf that was taking up space, that wasn’t your favourite toy?
Definitely wasn’t a favourite toy, absolutely not.
I am 100% sure of that.
It has now become THE toy you want? 

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How to Prepare Your Child for Moving Home

8/12/2020

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A question that comes up a lot in parenting groups is 'How do I help to prepare my child for moving home?!' This is a great question and I some tried-and-tested ideas for you!

You'll probably want to consider your child's age, personality and life experiences (so far) when thinking about what will help them in the lead-up to moving home. I've written about how to talk with children about moving home here. Think about how your approach to helping them prepare to move home can fit with their everyday preferences and experiences. 

The main thing to remember in all the stress of moving is that you know your child best.

Talking to children and explaining the different aspects involved in moving home can be really important for their wellbeing. We all move home in different circumstances. Sometimes there is uncertainty and/or things happen at short-notice. Listening to children and responding to their needs helps them to prepare for moving home.

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Moving House: Building Children's Resilience

25/11/2020

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In my last blog post (available here), I discussed the idea that resilience is something that can be developed. I challenged the idea we often hear that ‘children are resilient’. I suggested that we, as parents, can help our children build their resilience in life changing circumstances, like when we move house. 

New research on how our brains work is telling us fascinating stuff! We now know that things like resilience are not innate or pre-determined. We can become more resilient if we do the right things to build our resilience. 


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Moving with Kids: Are Kids Resilient?

17/11/2020

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When you talk about moving home with kids lots of people say ‘kids are resilient’.
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I have heard this so many times over the years, as a researcher working with moving families. I was on a Facebook group the other day and someone asked how to help their 4-year-old move house. Someone responded ‘kids are more resilient than parents’. Even if that is true (which it isn’t), I don’t think it really helps answer the question about how to help a young child cope with a home move.

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    Naomi Tyrrell PhD
    Mentor, Author and Research Consultant.


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